I like to think

I like to think that my hairdresser and I have a relationship. No, it's not that sort of relationship; but it's a relationship nonetheless. After all, we've seen each other nearly once a month for the past four-and-a-half years, and that's more than I've seen some of my friends.

In any case, this relationship, if you will, tends to carry itself out in the same manner each time we meet: First, I sit down in the big chair; then, she gets out her sharp instruments and puts them in my hair; as she works, we make small talk and I try not to pray too loudly for it all to go well; and finally, I thank her, fork over some cash, and am out the door again. It's a ritual that is comforting in its sameness, I suppose.

But I must admit that, lately, I've started to wonder if perhaps it's all a bit too same. Mind you, I'm not complaining about the haircut itself -- that part is fine, or at least I like to think so. But I wonder if there's something peculiar about the way our tete-a-tetes always center around the same discussion.

Allow me to explain: First, she says, "It's been a long time since you've come to visit." Then I respond, "Nah, it's only been about four weeks or so." Then she says, "Your hair must grow very fast." And here I shrug and, as if on cue, respond with, "There are worse problems to have." After this, there is a bit of silence while she nips and trims and slices, and this moment between us is only ever broken when she finally says, "Boy, you've got really thick hair." And, of course, I must shrug again and say, "Yeah, it's unruly at times." Then more silence.

Anyway, you get the picture.

So is it wrong of me to want more from this relationship? Am I just being naive in thinking that this time with my hairdresser could be so much more? Should I stop wondering if there are others out there who actually manage to have great, engrossing conversations with the people that cut their hair? You know those conversations, right -- the ones in which you tell your barber all your problems and then he or she gives you advice that is so true that one day you plan to pass it on to your children?

Anyway, that's my dilemma. Maybe someone should open up a place where you can get your hair cut and chat with a bartender at the same time. Yes, a bartender would be good. Or a psychiatrist.