why's daddy in jail?

Clearly, I've had a few things on my mind lately. So it's no wonder I completely forgot about jury duty. That's right, I completely blew off my civic responsibility and simply did not show at the courthouse on my appointed jury duty date. I, my friends, am a criminal.

And I'll tell you, when I finally realized what had happened -- on the day after I was supposed to be at the courthouse -- I got that feeling in my stomach that I sometimes get when I eat the leftover Chinese food from the cartons at the back of the 'fridge. And I imagined a frightening scene in which I would have to do the drive-of-shame down to the courthouse and turn myself in to the bailiff, who would proceed to handcuff me and haul me off to spend a night in jail, where there would be no Chinese food, just bread and water. An alternate scene had me on the lam in Mexico, occasionally sending the wife and kid some pesos and a letter signed with my pseudonym, Nacho; but I quickly dismissed that as a bit melodramatic (and plainly quite difficult to pull off given border security these days.)

Fortunately, when I called the courthouse, the world's nicest clerk answered and let me reschedule. I didn't even get a scolding.